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Monday, August 20, 2007
*sHiMiN* posted at 6:52 PM

God used to love me, giving me smiles, laughter, luck etc.. But somehow, god was cruel today. he took back my smiles, laughter, luck, giving me only tears. TOTALLY screwed up my SPA todae.. abt 14 procedures to be done yet i onli did 5 or 6 steps.. i think, i have totally lost count.. i repeated frm step 1-5 for three times.. yet, i still could not get even the slightest ppt in the whole wide world.. Her PISSED OFF face once again showed up in front of me..
"Go and re-do".... this is what she said for 2 times.

the whole error repeat itself again..

" must i re-do?", asking her with my bloodshot eyes.

At last, she gave up and said" dun nid to re-do.. do wat u can now.."

tears started to form from my eyes.. and it dropped anywhere.. cant control myself anymore..re-do 3 times still the same results.. i truly hate myself, but there's nth i can do..i'm stupid.. There's no one to help me and she wouldn even care to check on me.. hope was gone far away..totally helpless..
aft the collection of the papers, chloe console me..

aft chem prac, Amala came n spoke to me, encouraging me..

i entered the chinese class.. the first thing i heard was

' we also get the same results, dun worry'.. they dun noe that i didn even get the chance to use my filter paper..

i dun noe who spoke that cos i was totally LOST.. not even one minute of rest to cool myself, that sarcastic laoshi spoke sarcastic words again..Cant even let me have the time to cool myself..eyelids was falling aft that, maybe too loaded with water.. i was trying to be funny after that ..drew on wk's book, trying things at alf, bullying wk, said sarcastic things to yvon but that was a good one not lik laoshi..saying how horny she is..trying to laugh but that was a forced one.

Amala accompanied me to boon lay bus interchange..on the way, she was commenting how red my face was while she sensed that sumthing was wrong n she turned to look at me.. after that, we took diff bus home..



Today's weather seems to be mourning with me, or rather showing sympathy.. no sunlight to make me flared up even more..

current mood: =( =( =(
dun ask me chem spa again..
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